Apologia

A prose piece instead of a poem..

Apologia.

I am jumpstarted today...at 2 35 am...
At 2 45 I dropped back to sleep
But by 4 35 am I rose.
Obviously the ghost of something will not let me sleep...
Know something funny?
We don't have a calling bell; So late night visitors scare me silly with ominous knocking...
I hiss and push my husband to  the door...
And if it's he who returns I make him identify himself at the top of his voice... Till he is roaring with impatient annoyance!
Yet I swear today at 4 35 am...the calling bell  rang ..loud and clear and insistent...
Repetitively trilling repeating it's note of  strange persuasion....

I got  up opened the  doorside window, peeked cautiously and opened the door.
And stood without a word...
Owning that I would find no one  waiting outside.
Still needing to open the door.
Open that door....was the dictum.
Of my mind.

I  guess morning has visited me  early...so I won't be afraid any more.
Of  the night.
Got another explanation?
For me this one will have to do.

Amrita Valan