Nevermore to Miss

How can I, must I, should I
Not miss you?
How do we move on ?
I have not
The art of discarding, replacing one human being with another,
Each is irreplaceable treasure.

Human beings are not vessels
To satisfy needs
We are not empty containers to hold you.
None of us can complete you
With our fullness.

So
The need remaining unfulfilled
The living being failing to fulfill it
Which do we replace really?

The living entity
Is an entirety
A body of explorations endless
The objectives of all exploration is to discover unknown continents.
The key is in not knowing.

You find an America
When you set sail to
Possess the treasures of India...

So are we open
to the entity we embraced to our human heart?
Or ticking off an endless list
A referendum of preferences?

The need that clings to living corners of our beating heart
Mine yours all are equally flesh and blood and can we rip off this need of ours as unique
And though you come with a different set of needs
And though you are unique
and me and you
Are not fitted parts of machines prefabricated to meet

In the meeting
Of hearts purposeful divinity blind
In the exchanges of soulful creating mind
Doesn't mere need dissolve
And utterly new necessity evolve?

Isn't that
What human translation means?

My mind is composite of memories that scream your name tongue is forbidden to utter
The beauty of utterance to relieve a pain
I can only meaninglessly mutter
The name the nemesis of pain  the meaning bracketing the essence of my worship
Giving identity of you to me
If can wear it  for all to see
Would I still be yours
Though you deny me?
Yes.
For I think I would be
As inhabitant of your past
Still yours
Forever yours
Not dissolved and washed
Like loose dirt into
Gutters of rain

I conclude I am yours my love
In rejection in pain
As much as I was yours
In possession and joy

We are human beings
Repositories of needs and wants
But I don't fill up your vacuums
And you dont stuff my hollowed shell
Like soft toys of pleasure.

For we are
Sparks waiting to be lit
Dormant fire nascent inspiration
Lying stagnant
Like natal dreams.

And we are the fine sifted dust of our characters
That coalesced under pressure
As chapters of life flipped
Over
And over
And over.

Flintstones
Of longing
Begging to be struck
Rubbings of memories
To rubble or rubies
Against the other.

I am so sorry
My love
I couldn't light you up
Eternally
I write my own fire

And for the next time
When a casual stroller by stoops to picks up this rock
It will contain too many memories
Of interactions
And any other foreign touch
Would inflict
Pain.

Howsoever I may forget
Minds are false mirrors
One reflects
another then another
In an infinite procession of replicas
Souls queued up without
number
In God's purposeful slumber...

My dear there is a core and kernel beyond the mortal shell
And there,
There you shall dwell.

A touch of you
A dream of you
A longing
A will o the wisp
Finer than
dawn reveries
Silken
dusk epiphanies
Braver than delight
Of days
deeper than seductive mysteries
Of
Night

Living in the presence of a God
I swear
My love to nevermore miss
Where in the heart of my heart
In the mingling rivers of all hearts
Is his mastery
There
You shall always
evermore
Dwell.

All rights reserved
(c) Amrita Valan 2014